abijam

self pity city

In Uncategorized on September 5, 2014 at 10:45 pm

The smiths are playing.

Empty meaningless tears are stinging my cheeks.

The only texts I got today were ones from a pizza company and from the guy I am seeing to tell me he no longer has time to commit to a relationship.

I am googling puppies because maybe a dog will fill this void.

I have my house on the market but I don’t know what I want after I have sold it.

Work feels stressful and pointless, but its the only constructive thing I have, the only real talking point in my life.

Friends are busy with boyfriends, and all but one of them live miles away, places I cannot afford to get to.

Everyone else socialises with a drink in their hand, something I excluded myself from in order to curb my dink problem, in order to stop sabotaging my social interactions with others.

Ironically by preventing social sabotage it means having to socially disconnect.

I know in the long run, this is the best course of action.

I am on the right path and everything happens for a reason.

There will always be pain involved, in everything.

The right thing will happen.

Or maybe I should just buy a cute little dog? I really want a dog.

And I do really love the smiths.

One day at a time.

(almost 6 weeks sober!!)

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  1. We ALL have days like that, regardless of whatever else we’re going through in life. xx

  2. Hang in! You maybe going through post acute withdrawal symptoms (P.A.W.S.), which include irritability, mood swings and general feeling of discontent. They usually show up around month 2. Don’t get discouraged though, you CAN do this! Keep trudging forward! Sending many hugs 🙂

    ps. Thanks for stopping by my blog.

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